It Is All About Perspective In the MBA programme, they taught us about human behaviour, but I learned a lot more from real experiences. It’s funny, I always tell Akua and Josie, “Hold on. Breathe, breathe.” As a leader, what you say and do has a lasting impact. Even at work, your actions set the tone. I had to transition from being a technical advisor who asserted authority to a leader who serves people. This was a huge change for me. I had to learn to listen and understand others’ issues. I noticed how well company leaders, including my bosses, listened to what I had to say. It made me reflect and ensure others felt heard. So, this was a skill I had to develop. My current engineering team is very diverse, with almost 40% being female engineers. Now, I have to focus more on listening and being empathetic, rather than just providing technical direction and guidance as I had done for years. It was a bit of a transition, but armed with lessons from my MBA, I was able to navigate it. Whenever I catch myself talking too much and not listening enough, I hear a voice in my head reminding me to be quiet and listen. 80% Is Sometimes Good Enough As a woman, and in conversations with my colleagues, I’ve noticed we often strive for perfection, which can lead to stress. One manager once told me, “Monica, you want it today? I’ll give you 80%. Give me two months, and I’ll give you 100%.” There was an instance where my female boss set a two-day deadline for a product delivery. We rushed to meet it, but none of the male bosses submitted their work on time. They actually took an extra week with minimal stress compared to us. When I asked one of the male peers about this, he explained that they had told the boss that if a perfect product was desired, they needed an additional week. If something less than perfect was acceptable, they could meet the two-day deadline. The boss opted for the longer timeline to ensure a better product and to avoid undue stress on the team, taking responsibility for any late delivery. Now, when I’mrushed, I remindmyself, “Monica, 80% is okay in that short timeframe — just declare it and don’t stress to achieve 100% immediately.” This was a significant lesson for me, especially as a Black woman trying to meet high standards. As I’ve grown older, I’ve realised I also have leverage and sometimes need to use it because personal health is paramount. Culture Is Different in Every Company Another lesson I learned is that company cultures can be very different. For example, one company I worked with had a lot of people who were very sensitive. You had to be careful not to offend anyone, as even small actions could be blown out of proportion. In contrast, at my new company or a previous one, people would often brush off similar issues and move on. This experience taught me the importance of understanding a company’s culture. I advise my mentees to spend the first six months learning how things work. Success often depends on how well you can integrate into that culture. If you don’t fit in, you’ll face many challenges. It Is About Equity I learned this in the MBA programme. If you see that someone is earning more than you for the same work, you need to talk to your boss. I remember working with a guy who was doing the same work as I was, but he was making more. So, I went to my boss and discussed it, saying, “It’s about equity.” She was surprised and quickly addressed the issue. Howdo you get that kindof boldness? It comes from knowing your worth, being confident in your work, and being able to articulate your request. If they don’t address it, it’s their loss. I learned to present my case clearly, and it paid off. After some reorganisations, I had the opportunity to write more technical papers and even led a working group to produce a highly anticipated document in tailings management. I also mentored high school students, including those from Holy Child. I focused on educating girls and helping them navigate challenges. I don’t want other women to face the difficulties I did, as there are ways to succeed while overcoming them. Work-Life Balance It took me a while to realise that my family’s activities needed to come first at all times, even as my career grew. I made it a point never to miss my kids’ games, recitals, or school events. I learned to create boundaries, ensuring no one contacted me during vacations unless it was an emergency. Looking back at pictures of my kids learning to ride bikes, playing soccer, and engaging in other activities, I cherish these moments that can’t be remade. I always tell my mentees that your health and family should come first, and no job is worth compromising that balance. Giving Back I firmly believe in giving back, whether in cash or kind. The Bible says that giving comes back to you in good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and runningover. Throughout my leadership career, giving has been integral. I’ve contributed around 15 technical articles and papers to advance tailings management in the Oil & Gas industry and participated in groups like the MAC Tailings Working Group and COSIA. It’s fulfilling to receive positive feedback from other engineers about the impact of my work. I also advocate for STEM, presenting and discussing the importance of women in these fields from high school to the industry. I volunteer at church, the Food Bank, the Centre of Hope, and various local charities. Giving back has been deeply rewarding. Ernest has always been my biggest supporter and ally in giving back to the profession and community. 34 The Birthday Journal
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